Beauty… the feminine quality that people love to hate. Beauty is under attack. The devil either wants us to be vain or not see the importance- or should I say, beauty- of beauty BOTH physical and spiritual. On one hand, impossible and lofty standards of physical beauty are being pushed onto young women. On the other hand, our society is trying to replace the qualities of inner beauty with self love- "if you feel like you’re beautiful, then you are". Outer beauty, according to society, is of no importance, and the beginning and end of inner beauty is loving yourself.
But both are important, one more so than the other, and we should honor God with our beauty, both inside and out.
Physical Beauty
Our culture is infatuated with physical beauty. On one hand, there are many people going around saying things such as, “You are beautiful no matter what,” completely downgrading the importance of being feminine, modest, and taking care of our health. On the other hand, there is an obsession with perfecting our looks through filters, surgeries, clothes, makeup, diets, etc.
Your worth is not found in your looks, nor are you better or worse than someone else for looking or dressing a certain way. Feminine beauty is not the end all be all, and is superficial at the end of the day. It is subjective and it doesn’t last forever. That being said, it is important that we take care of ourselves and make an effort to look feminine. We should strive to honor God with this earthly temple He has given us, and we can do this through the appreciation and maintenance of our feminine beauty (not to mention that it’s great for pleasing our husband’s as well).
The essence of physical beauty is embracing the fact that you are a woman, and showing appreciation for who God made you by dressing feminine and taking care of yourself.
God created women to be beautiful and physically attractive. And I mean, there is a reason that women makeup, nail polish, a large variety of clothing items, and a billion and one other products are marketed towards women. It is inherently feminine for a woman to want to be beautiful. To be physically beautiful you do not need every single product under the sun, to wear the latest trends, or to be obsessive about the way you look.
These clothing and hairstyles are androgynous and/or masculine, just for example.
You should, however, be cautious to avoid androgynous and masculine clothing, wearing clothes that are modest and feminine, not baggy and boyish. Be sure to wear feminine haircuts and hairstyles.
Here are some examples of feminine outfits. You do not have to have one specific style to be feminine.
This also means taking care to eat nutritious foods, avoiding processed foods, and having a lifestyle that is not sedentary.
Caitlin from the blog Mrs. Midwest Caitlin, has an amazing blog and YouTube content on the topic of outer beauty. I highly recommend checking her out if you haven’t for more beauty tips.
Inner Beauty
Being physically beautiful is the easy part. Cultivating inner beauty is a much more difficult task. Why? Because our flesh (a.k.a our sinful nature) gets in the way. It’s not something we are born with, or something that comes naturally to us. In our moments of weakness, we are much more prone to showing our ugly side than we are anything that is good and beautiful. Proverbs 11:22 says, “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.” Another word similar to discretion is the word “prudent" which means “marked by wisdom or judiciousness”. A beautiful woman without wisdom or the ability to exercise sound judgment and be discerning is the equivalent to a big ol’ ugly, muddy, hog, with a ring in its snout. The ring may be gorgeous, but the animal is still hideous (think wild boar). We can be a pig with a gold ring in its snout if we lack wisdom and discernment, as well as any of these other ugly qualities:
Anger: Anger is the fuel we use to get what we want. It breeds entitlement, and we use it to get what we want, to hurt others, and to excuse our wrongdoings. We must not be quick to anger and frustration.
Jealousy: Jealousy is another ugly trait that leads to comparison, discontentment, and hatred towards others. When we are jealous of someone, we can tear them apart by judging them because we think that they think that they are better than us; or we tear ourselves apart by judging ourselves and feeling like we aren’t “good enough.”
Attention-seeking: Attention-seeking can be done through both vanity and self-pity. Vanity is the obsession with looking a certain way, obsessing about staying up with the trends, constantly trying to draw attention to your looks and achievements, wanting all eyes on you because of the way you look or the thing you did. Constantly feeling bad for yourself or putting yourself down is another way we seek attention. It’s one thing to need encouragement every once in a while, but it’s another way to use self- pity to manipulate others into feeling bad for you. Most times, people use self-pity as attention grabs. I’ve even noticed this in my own life, and on top of that, most of the things I pity myself for are not rooted in truth, but rather, they are lies that the devil is using to draw my attention away from what’s right and onto myself.
Gossip: Us women are known for our gossip. We go on and on, saying things about other people that are not true, or not confirmed to be true. It is very easy to slander other people when they are not around.
Complaining: It is SO easy to grumble and complain. It’s too hot. I’m tired. I’m hungry. Nothing’s going right. I don’t feel like it. Even making noises such as sighing or scoffing are signs of complaint.
Imperishable Beauty
“...let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands…” 1 Peter 3:4 & 5
One day, Lord willing, you will be old and frail, with saggy skin and thinning hair. However, you can still be beautiful even without the looks- and the way to do this is by having a gentle and quiet spirit, or, in other words, inner beauty. This type of beauty is imperishable. It never goes away. And I would venture to say that it only grows more beautiful the older one gets. So, how do you cultivate a gentle and quiet spirit? Well, I completely neglected to mention this is my post on a quiet spirit, but verse 5 of 1 Peter 3 says it all:
“For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves [with a gentle and quiet spirit], by submitting to their own husbands.”
Submission, whether it be to your husband if you are married, or to God if you are single, is not always easy, and requires many qualities to make submission possible:
Sweetness and kindness: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32
Humility: When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom. Proverbs 11:2
Contentment and gratitude: Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6
Patience: Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the bosom of fools.
Ecclesiastes 7:9
Service and selflessness: For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. Galatians 5:13
Wisdom: She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. Proverbs 31:26
In turn, you will have inner beauty that is honoring to God and to your husband (if you have one), and attractive to those around you.
With love,
Solie Osorio
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Let's chat: What are some other inner beauty qualities that I missed?